this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize