dude i'm inner monologue high
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
