We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
