Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
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