Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
