Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
