Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
dude. I can hear the air.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
