I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
