best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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