Have you finally orgasmed yet?
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Randomize
