i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
