I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Randomize
