Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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