OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
