I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Randomize
