So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
