You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
