don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
