Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Randomize
