There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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