How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
His nipple licking is glorious
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