is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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