i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Randomize