How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
