Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize