I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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