is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
