4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
