we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Randomize