Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize