you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
