If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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