I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
