What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Come see our sink grown plant.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize
