You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
people are starting to question the shark bite story
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize