i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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