have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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