In the future we'll all be gay
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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