Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
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