sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
