We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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