i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
