you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Randomize
