one might say we're banned from that church
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
