White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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