I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
