i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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