He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize