Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
dude. I can hear the air.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
