I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
