Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Randomize
