So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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